Everything gonna be okay

Do you this cute little girl above?her name is tiffany.I remember this photo is taken when we are having band practice.I think is when we are form 2.i think that having some activities at KRP there and she ask me to help her take picture.she is funny and cute.And now she is gone.She go to Jesus there with my grandpas.I believe she is safe now.But i still don't believe she is gone although i have went to her house twice time.I went to her house this noon with basil,yeo,brandon,sasa and samuel.I don't cry because she looks like she is sleeping so i don't want to cry in front of her again.We enter the house and brandon is the first person cry and he walk out from the house while i see basil cry too and its the first time to see that.While samueal and yeo doesn't cry because i know they trying to hold back their tears.i know they dont want to cry in front of tiffany.then we go back school.Sasa and i both lose our appetite so we only eat two piece of bread.We enter the class.None of us is talking except samuel because he is not really close to her so i don't mind about it.Anyway,Thanks to BRANDON who is crying there make me cry too.And i know basil is crying too just he dont let us see.Tiffany,does you se it?your friend are waiting for you and yet you left us so soon.I knwo i can't force you to come back but i hope i can spend more time with you before this.TIFFANY,MAY YOU REST IN PEACE.

XOXO,

Belle.

What the hell is happening to my life right now?

This week is a totally terrible week for me.I lost my beloved grandpa two days ago and i am just crying like hell when i visit him at hospital at sibu.I am regret i don't go to his funeral because its hard for me to arrange my time.I am glad to see my Spm result and the same day i am sad because my grandpa funeral is on the same day too.I thanks to my grandpa has bless me.But at the same day,i meet one of my friends call tiffany.She is happy for me for me and hug me while congratz me for the results.I thanks to her.I never know that is our last hug and our last conversation.if i know it,i wont let her go from me.And now I lost her.She is gone.This is what everyone tell me and i see it on newspaper too.But i choose not to believe so i don't cry unless i see her death body.I don't want to accept the fate i lose my two beloved person in a week.I never accept this so I won't cry in front of everyone!not until i see her real body..

XOXO,

belle

Sadness all over around me

Dear bloggie,

Sorry for so long not to updating my blog.Do you see the picture above?i hope to stand there too.I need a place that can make me forget everything even for 30 seconds is more than enough.There are too many things happen for the past few days.Sadness is fly around the atmosphere.I don't know how many litres has just flow out from my eyes.I can't control myself.God,please do listen to my prayer.My grandpa dead and i am not going back tomorrow because i scare i cant catch up my studies,i have to take my spm result and my dad ask me not to go too since he wants me to take care home.But I feel my guityness in my heart because i don't go attend his funeral.Am i too selfish?Please tell me what to do right now.I think i am selfish.I know i will regret forever.